Why am I blogging this?

As I mentioned in an answer to PW’s comment, I feel a need to NOT have this just ‘forgotten and swept under the carpet’.

I have indeed lost the best 25 years of my life.

I can never be young again.

Yes I have a family and am now happy in a new church. But I was not, for those 25 years, anything like me. MCF took the me out of me, leaving . . almost nothing, a shell of a man. I suffered horrific psychological abuse at the hands of those men and that presbytery and that church.

I was banned from doing anything I wanted to do career, business or travel-wise for 25 years. Maybe not a big thing for some. But for me, that was me. I was not a sportsman or talker or counsellor or musician. I was an innovator, inventor and entrepreneur and deep lover of God’s word. Undoubtedly. And I’m doing really well at it now.

But MCF just loved pigeon-holing us. Neither were we allowed an independent thought or contribution in the word or ministry for all those 25 years. 25 years of homegroups without being able to say anything off topic. It was like death. And because we got black-listed we couldn’t even contribute to anything on topic either unless it was confessing how relevant Vic’s latest word was to our life. Richard Kaa Snr said ‘why haven’t we had Paul teaching Bible studies?’ That was right up my alley but had never crossed their mind because I couldn’t settle in laying down all my prerogatives.

But most of all, I had some amazing opportunities in technology and business which I had to just ‘lay down’. Including working a job I hated for five additional years.

In the end it was just stupid and wasteful and caused unemployability, depression and financial ruin.

But I am healing. I used to cry almost daily. Not just for me. My family suffered hugely in this. And the church destroyed my mother. And took my father for granted. My sister and brother-in-law were treated poorly as well.

I rarely despair about it now. That doesn’t mean I don’t think about it. I’m still trying to work out what it is that really happened. And what do I still believe?

And of course I hope some MCFers will read this and realize the true human damage their ridiculously one-tracked emphases and ‘obey your particular elder or go to hell’ teaching and psychological abuses and lies and cover-ups have done to people who love the Lord.

Just because I chose to finally write it up in more detail here in this blog does not mean I am ‘still ranting’. I just don’t think it should be swept under the carpet.

Like I say to my wife: if David Bonham, Laurie Holland and Vic Hall stole my car we would go get it back from them. Well, they stole a lot more from me than that. Remember all their words carried the rarely said (but not never said) authority of ‘otherwise you will go to hell’. They were firing with live ammunition and they knew it.

For the record, I was asked by MCF what restitution I would expect and I suggested those 25 years were worth at least $10 million to me but I discounted the restitution to $200K to help us restart our life. Nothing received yet of course. We still have no home and owe about $80K to various institutions.

What happened to me was real, systematic, continuous, known by the presbytery (who deny it, even though one of the presbytery was a perpetrator), not that long ago and it’s still happening to people.

And I still suffer every day from it.

Yes God knows. And bottles my tears. And revenge is His.

But for the sake of others, I’m not going to keep another MCF secret ever again. I kept this secret from everyone for 25 years because of their evil code of silence.